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Why some make the big bucks (Humor)

2K views 23 replies 6 participants last post by  Argent11 
#1 ·
A giant ship engine failed. The ship’s owners tried one expert after another, but none of them could figure but how to fix the engine.

Then they brought in an old man who had been fixing ships since he was a young. He carried a large bag of tools with him, and when he arrived, he immediately went to work. He inspected the engine very carefully, top to bottom.

Two of the ship’s owners were there, watching this man, hoping he would know what to do. After looking things over, the old man reached into his bag and pulled out a small hammer. He gently tapped something. Instantly, the engine lurched into life. He carefully put his hammer away. The engine was fixed!

A week later, the owners received a bill from the old man for ten thousand dollars.

“What?!” the owners exclaimed. “He hardly did anything!”

So they wrote the old man a note saying, “Please send us an itemized bill.”

The man sent a bill that read:

Tapping with a hammer………………….. $ 2.00

Knowing where to tap…………………….. $ 9,998.00
 
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#2 ·
Lol it happens. One time I had to drive from Roswell all the way up to Vail Colorado for Motorolla who had one of their generators fail.
They were in a panic, had two men come out of Denver who were telling them it was burnt up, trashed out.
It had a blown fuse because a rat chewed on a wire. Two minute fix.

The company man told me to make up something complicated and involved on my service report so they didn't look so stupid.
When he had to turn that in. Hey, got to go to Vail on a payed vacation. I should have taken my wife with me.
 
#3 ·
INVOICE


Generator Off at Arrival
Locked Out / Tagged Out - Safely
Observed Manual Taped to Inside Jacket of Panel - Shook Head
Rocked Switch Back and Forth (On / Off) Left Off
Called Power Company about Known Outages
Visually Traced Every Wire
Dohicky connected to Thingamajig burned
Retrieved Dohickey Pliers and copper wire brush from Toolbox
Removed Dohickey as Old
Inspected Thingamagjig
Brushed Off soot from Thingamajig with copper wire brush
Replaced Dohickey as New
Returned Dohickey Pliers and copper wire brush to Toolbox
Rocked Switch Back and Forth (On / Off) Left On
Observed Manual Taped to Inside Jacket of Panel - Shook Head
Tagged In / Unlocked - Safely
Power On
Generator Running at Departure
 
#8 · (Edited)
Negative, Paula was a junior, at the time, Mechanical Engineer, PE now, who has outgrown my capabilities immeasurably. She is articulate, inquisitive, resourceful, knowledgeable, at the top of "her game plan", very well respected by her Peers and our Clients, and if you cannot tell, it is Associate Performance Appraisal/Evaluation time in our firm, so I am pretty well oiled on the behalf of my Associates. I am proud to have taken a small part in Mentoring her. We took a "Plant Trip" for Marketing together circa 2000 to Kodiak, Alaska, where a number of her family still reside. We stayed with her Uncle and the three of us played Cribbage until 2 AM almost every night and on the plane rides there and back. It was a very good trip. We didn't get the work, but we gained a lot of respect for one another on that trip alone. I'm twice her age and she appreciated all the business insights I could provide. She, and her contemporaries are the future of our business, in whom I am well pleased.
 
#10 ·
I never had a female apprentice they were always males. The mechanic shop had couple of them and they said they were real go getters. Better than some of the men they had. LO, PE or P&E? The TVA and Westinghouse had a couple of girls who followed us around. We were training them on the programming of the ATS.
 
#9 ·
I went to a metal shop and bought about 100 or so pieces of 3/4" rebar. They all had to be cut to 24" length. While he was writing out the receipt, the guy at the counter asked me what I was going to do with them. I told him "I resell them".
"How much do you get for them?" he asked.
"Anywhere from $500-$1000 apiece. I've even sold one for over $2000" I told him.
"Holy (expletive)!! Who buys them for that much!?!?"
"People who want their property surveyed."
"Oh."
 
#16 ·
And then you have the other end of the spectrum, I worked in a cabinet shop when the owner asked one of the go-fers to go pick up 250 board feet of lumber, she came to me with a panicked look asking how that would fit in the company van, I told her about 8 ft would be in the van with the rest hanging out the back, but not to worry they would put a little wheel at the end so it wouldn't drag on the road, :tango_face_devil:.


She had worked there for a couple of years, should'a known better.
 
#20 ·
LO, there were so many contractors involved with that boondoggle space port I couldn't kept a count of them.
It wouldn't surprise in the least if you guys were out there in some capacity also.
I have no idea what's going to ever be done with that place now. They should make it into a museum.

An exhibit to mans ability to waist money on stupid projects.
 
#21 · (Edited)
Perhaps. What State? Texas? That's Blue Origin.


Fortunately yours is not the Country's prevailing attitude toward the Space Program from which the folllowing creature comfort, recreation, and mankind pain-easing possibilities derive:


http://www.therichest.com/rich-list/the-biggest/20-shocking-nasa-inventions-we-use-everyday/
1. Artificial Limbs
2. Smoke Detectors
3. Solar Energy
4. Land Mine Removal
5. Cochlear Implants
6. Aircraft Anti-Icing System
7. Better Software
8. CatScans
9. Infrared Ear Thermometers
10. Insulin Pumps
11. Workout Machines
12. Freeze Drying
13. Scratch Resistant Lenses
14. Invisible Braces
15. Water Filters
16. Portable Cordless Vacuum
17. Ribbed Swimsuits
18. Insulation
19. Memory Foam
20. Super Soaker
 
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