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post #3 of (permalink) Old 08-22-2019, 08:53 AM Thread Starter
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Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: Live - Cocoa, FL; Hunt - Mims, FL; Lk. Poincette, FL; Union, SC
Posts: 10,604
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It has been a month of Sundays since I was last motivated to bush hog or even go to the property, except for repair of the tractor and to drop it off and pick it up from there. I have had no motivation whatsoever. I have spent the ensuing 2 years and 1 month dealing with life and my life-long hunting partner's estate, which demise by his own 80-year old hand, sucked ALL of the oxygen out of my life. The remaining vacuum has left me numb.

I LIVED to take that man hunting, to get me out of my house and him out of his house and both of us into the woods, to hunt or target shoot, to food plot, and to contemplate life without wives, kids, mortgages, taxes, or the other trappings of a modern life. He was my reloading Mentor. He kept me moving in a forward direction with all things guns, ammunition, NRA, hunting, and in particular storytelling through the bad years of my failed marriage and his late-in-life brain-scratching marriage. That he knew where my "dead bodies" were buried and I his made for all the much more merriment.

He was a native-born FLORIDIAN with tales of OLD Florida that could only be recounted by those that were there. I was there too, but 16 years his Junior. I knew of, but didn't take the same footsteps.

It is therapeutic for me to recount the life of the man, if even in my own head. I have to clear those thoughts, to memorialize them, to cement them for antiquity, to grow, to move forward, to find my path again.

Yesterday's motivation was a start in that direction. Now, I have to wait for evaporation and hope we are not beset by a hurricane or two or three. There are some things I can do in the meantime that will be of benefit when the bush hogging is done and the planting is ready to start.

Recalculate the areas to be planted. Calculate fertilizer needs. Call suppliers for the availability of seed. Gather my thoughts. Check that equipment is in good condition. Repair the 20-blade disc (#1 priority).

All of this is good for clearing the fog. I am starting, just a little, to look forward to another deer season.
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