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http://www.cerpcerk.com/dont-cremate-deceased-pet-oven/


A vulture boards a plane carrying two dead raccoons and the flight attendant says I'm sorry, we only allow one carrion.


A toothless termite goes into a bar and asks is the bar tender here?


Why did the turkey cross the road? It was the chicken's day off.


Thing to do when you're on a plane within two months before Christmas and a little kid is being unruly and the parents won't do anything about it... Get the kids attention, make eye contact, and say Santa isn't real. The kid will become even more unruly, but the parents will be beside themselves trying to undo the damage. It will be worth the hassle.
 
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