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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
This one came to me via e-mail and I thought it too funny not to post. :-D

Ma and Pa were two hillbillies living in Perry County
out on the farm up in the hills. Pa has found out
that the hole for the outhouse is full. He goes
In the house and tells Ma he doesn't know what to
do empty the hole. Ma says, "Why don't you go ask
the youngun down the road???. He must be smart
because he is a college graduate."

So Pa drives down to the neighbors. He asked him
"Mr. College graduate, my hole for the outhouse is
full and I don't know what to do to empty it."

The youngun tells him," Get yourself two sticks
of dynamite, one with a short fuse and one with a
long fuse. Light them both under the outhouse.
The first one will go off and shoot the outhouse
in the air. The second one will then go off and
spread the poop all across your farm and fertilize
your ground. The outhouse will then come back down
to the same spot and you will have an empty hole
for the outhouse."

Pa thanks the neighbor and picks up two sticks of
dynamite at the hardware store, one with a short
fuse and one with a long fuse. He goes home and
puts them under the corner of the outhouse. He
lights them and then runs behind a tree. All of a
sudden, Ma comes running out of the house and into
the outhouse!! BOOM!! Off goes the first stick of
dynamite and shoots the outhouse in the air. BOOM!!
Off goes the second stick of dynamite and spreads
the poop all across the farm. The outhouse comes
crashing back down on the hole.

Pa races to the outhouse, throws open the door and
asks, "Ma, are you alright??!!" As she pulls up her
pants she says, "Yeah, but I'm sure glad I didn't
fart in the kitchen."

Premium Member
10,946 Posts
If'n I'd a been drinking anything when I read that, there would been a mess on the 'puters screen for sure. Good one!

Premium Member
4,986 Posts
Ever see the Alaska: The Last Frontier episode where they had to move the outhouse due to the "poopsicle?" ;D

7,617 Posts
Maw said "Paw the outhouse is broke."
Paw said "how can ah out house be broke?".
Maw said "go look".
Paw went and looked and went back to maw and said "didn't see nothin wrong".
Maw said "you didn't look close enough, go look again."
Paw left and came back shortly and maw ask "Did you see it?"
Paw said "no but a splinter hung my beard."
Maw said "hurts don't it!"

42,140 Posts
My cousin Glenn went through a real life outhouse explosion. They would follow the well worn path to the outhouse after dark. Once inside strike a match to light the lantern, then toss the match down the hole. His older brother thought it would be funny to pour some kero in the hole just before dark. It kinda blew up. Glenn had skin grafts to both cheeks and upper thighs. Not funny anymore. POWDERMAN. :eek: :eek:

Premium Member
1,719 Posts
I always liked the old joke referring to the outhouse with the title of a book called" Five Miles From The Outhouse" by Willy Makeit!

Back in the 40`s I lived on the farm for awhile and my grandparents did not have indoor plumbing. The outhouse was about 60 yards from the house! It was a "One Seater" Summer time had to fight wasp and watch out for the Black Widows! Winter time with a cold draft coming up through the seat always caused one of life`s little mysteries if you were a little boy! :eek: :eek: Woe be unto you if you had to go during a real clouded sky during a windy winter night!!
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